you are a credit to yourself, rach and society. you've done well to get to where you are as this will remain with you for life, all the best bud
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you are a credit to yourself, rach and society. you've done well to get to where you are as this will remain with you for life, all the best bud
I had the strangest dream lastnight regarding this
I really hope Rach doesn't have brown hair, brown eyes, because that would be really freaky:wtf:
just spent the last hour reading this and i have had tears in my eyes from start to finish, i cant believe what you have had to go through and totally understand your decision to 'move on' as it were, do the doctors know the full extent of her damage? or is it just a case of more than likely permanant?
cant of been easy and i like all the others have huge respect for what youve done and are still doing.
Been reading this thread for a while, just seen the picture of the car, jesus man I cant even make out what kinda car it is, much respect for you Stan, I don't think I could do what you're doing.
Still have enough respect for you mate, you've made some tough decisions in the last year but it's still nice to see you are there for her.
Only now can I partly imagine the extent of the accident having seen the car (looks like a 106)
Time can be a great healer and I hope this is the case for Rach.
:thumb:
Christ almighty! all the best for her, hope she recovers completely although early to say really!
lost a very good friend about three years ago to a similar crash, my hearts with you! as you said drive safely :( as already said. dont give up! shes a fighter by the sounds of it x
its been over a year mate, unfortunatly as much as it pains me to say a chance of a full recovery is slim he also says the doc said little chance of going home again, of course we all hope and prey she does.Quote:
Originally Posted by Nebbz
Heart wrenching reading all this mate, really do wish you all the luck in the world for the future, amazing you got through it.
Thanks for all the lovely replies folks.
And im just your regular guy. Nothing special.
dont put yourself down mate i dont no antone who would have done what you have done for rach stick in there mate even if its just as a friend she will apreciate it deep down and she will no its you
Small Update.
Rach is now up in Edinburgh where she is receiving lots of physio etc.
Being honest i have kinda fell outta the loop and not 100% sure of whats happening. Kinda struggling what with it being Xmas etc, as i keep thinking that this time last year i was in the worst place i have ever been in my life.
Going and seeing Rach doesnt help me in the slightest so ive backed off for a bit till i can bare it.
I have the court case looming on the horizon which i could really do without.
Just realised this post is all about me. I wish it was different.
Dude i would try not to beat your self up about thinking more about your self, As you say you've been through it now, your almost on the other side from the sounds of things, and your moving on with your own life, it's not you being selfish or nasty, it's just unfortunate that it all had to be this way in the first place, you couldn't stay with her the way things are, im sure her family understand,and im sure most other guys would of had less contact in a shorter time scale then you kept it going etc..
Just my thoughts on things, i know i cant really put my self in your shoes but i can say how i see it.
Scott
good luck chap, just keep plodding along and you will come to terms with it one day! hope you can get it sorted chap!
:thumb: keep smiling!
Im gonna pop round and see her folks soon. Cant explain how bad i feel about it all. So much shame. Feel so guilty.
Dreading the court case too.
like scott said dont beat your self up.
it was a VERY tough call you had to make and IMO you have done the best you can.
keep going strong.
I don’t read books but I have just read this start to finish. Stan mate, good on you for everything that you have done. Takes a lot but im sure you have learnt a lot and now have a new out look on life.
Good luck with your future and I hope Rachel makes progress.
Maximum respect.
Richard
Am sorry im on this forum nearly everyday and ive never came across this thread Stan
My thoughts are with both Rachael, yourself and her friends and family
Luck after yourself. Rachael will want you to remember the good times and enjoy your life, youve got a friend forever however big or small the contact is.
Joe
I know I dont know you and im just echoing what everyone else has been saying on here but you really are a great sounding guy. and you shouldnt feel guilty or ashamed of anything that you have done. you could of walked away as soon as you had heard how bad her injuries were and the possible long-term effects but you didnt. You stayed by her side for months and all that you did probably helped her recovery to what she is now a lot faster than she would of done had you not been there
you probably know more than anyone else that she would want you to be happy in the long run and you should be glad that you got yourself through the dark days and are still around to visit her.
I wish you all the best for the future with your new girlfriend and also that you are happy with the friend that you now have in rach.
x
i just read the whole thread...im actually stuggling with what to put. you have my utmost respect :)
I too have just thread this thread, i cant put in words how sorry i am for you and Rach and what you've been thru. I can only say i'm sorry to read/hear everything you've both been thru.
I do hope she carries on getting better and so do you.
Got to say your currage(sp) and ability to cope with all of this is amazing.
I tip my hat to you for that.
So sorry for it all. My best to you both.
Again, thanks for all these messages folks. They really do help.
Me and the new Mrs split a little while ago. I kinda guess Rach was still on my mind alot, and whenever the slightest arguement arose, i took off. Simply cannot deal with stress anymore. Ive walked out of two jobs and now a relationship in an attempt to get away from stress. Im coping ok with it for now . .
Think you need some time to chill dude, you've had a lot of weight to carry on your shoulders. Going from one relationship into another when things are considered 'normal' makes things difficult but you've gone into another relationship after one with some rather extenuating circumstances, so it's bound to take a toll on you.
Hi
still new to the site and this is the first time i have read this tread..
Stan you truely are a very brave and decent young man and you should be proud of yourself.
I really do hope that Rach continues to improve...i also hope that you Stan can still move on with your life and find some peace you truly couldnt do anymore than you already have....and the fact that you still care about Rach says alot about you....give yourself a huge pat on the back.
good luck with the court case.......
keep your chin up
take care
Stan, only just found this thread mate, ive read every word, and im soo sorry to hear about this and everything that you went through
really shows you how fragile life is and that it should be treasured in everyway
and some people have 'major' money worries that stress them??
you deserve a certificate for what you have done/ been throught.
dont you ever let anyone tell you any different.
Chin up mate
Rhydian
this really puts life into perspective for me pal chin up! x
man ive read i couple if bits on different pages and ill feel for you man. you are a seriously strong man and hold in there feller, its funking awesome to hear that she is up :). i had an incident this year when my brothers best mate borrowed my brothers car, hit black ice at about 20mph got hit side on by an oncoming car and died instantly. this happened in feb this year and the passenger started walking off of his crutches properly today.
best wishes to her and you mate:thumb:
Ross
Struggling bad of late. Real bad.
Signed off work and back on tablets.
Bumped into Rachs brother last night in a pub who was completely ****ted and didnt seem happy at all with me. I took bad to this is walked home then proceeded to cry my eyes out.
Got the court case coming up on the 1st Feb and i am not looking forward to it at all. I want out.
Are you still in contact with Rach's brother or is this the first time you have seen him for a while? Him being drunk doesn't give you a true reflection of how he's feeling. The court case is coming up for him too so don't feel too down on him and yourself. I'm guessing last night was a one off so don't think this is the way it's always going to be.
It will be hard going through the court case, but there will be a time when it is over and done with, this time is getting closer every day.
It's sh1tty time of year anyway and you need to make sure this time off you have is used positively. Having been signed off work before for the reasons I'm guessing you've been signed off, I say do something active which raises the heartbeat, rest regularly, eat properly. Then you can fit other things into the gaps.
Very true, so don't let that bother you as you haven't done anything wrong.Quote:
Originally Posted by dannyb
i wasnt aware of this thread until half hour ago...me and the missus have sat and read it word for word(by page 3 she had tears)this has touched me,your strength of character is just astonishing! I really am gobsmacked as to how 1 person can cope with so much stress!
so so sorry to hear about it all mate.
we would like to wish rach + you all the very best
Roy & Hannah
stanly mate, im really sorry about what has happened to rach, unfortunatly in life we are subjected to trials and tribulations that make you question your life, i lost my mum last year, i was 20, had a brother of 15 and a sister of 12. She past away a day after my brothers birthday and had been fighting cancer for three years, it shattered us all but life must go on, you got to get back to work mate and off the drugs, they may make you better at the time but they wont help you in the long run, youve got to be strong and make Rach proud, do you think it would make her feel good if she knew you where this down? everything happens for a reason and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. i wish you all the best in life mate a respect your courage for talking about it.
I have had word that the driver of the van is being charged with careless driving.
He was 1 metre over onto the other side of the road and on his phone.
Court case is tomorrow. I have to appear. Not looking forward to it at all.
I'll update after the hearing.
your a good fella mate, keep us updated ;)
Oh and apparently after the crash, he threw his phone and sat nav away before police could get there.
That cut me up when i heard that.
people panic, just get through the day tell the truth and know that you have a support network of people on here:thumb: i dont know you i dont judge you but anyway i can i'll help you and im sure many of the rest of us will too:)
chin up mate, life has been hard for both of you, but life isnt over for either of you.
Allan.
all the best mate, lets hope our justice system prevails and he dont go free
WOW cant believe what you have both been through!!
Hope the court case goes well for you, stay strong. Its so horrible that lives can be destroyed so quickly. I do hope that you can pull yourself through this and that you can see light at the end of the tunnel. x
first time have seen this thread, near in tears , just read it all and it really makes you think about life, if that happened to my girlfriend i know i couldnt cope, as said before keep your chin up and hope for the best, hope all goes well mate, and hope court goes well, heart goes out to you mate.
Best regards Matt
best of luck with the hearing,the driver should be locked up for life!!!! all the best from me and hannah.
well the records from the mobile phone company would be interesting...... and i think satnavs leave a trace somewhere, but i'm not sureQuote:
Originally Posted by Stanley