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Just remember children have the most amazing imaginations (sp).Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Stig
when I was young I could dream up anything I wanted and try and make it real.
Just dont let him get out of control, as long as he knows you will do somthing about it if he does he will soon enough get the idea.:thumb:
you could put his food through a blender, then serve it on a plastic plate with a plastic spoon.....when he questions it, point out that as he is acting like a toddler, he will be treated like one.
They always have, i was on my own with them for 8 years, and every time i said no to something, he would just ride up to grans house and ask them....and voila!!...he got everything he asked for, eg...good report got him a fiver from me........a £100 electric scooter from them. 6 months later when it was destroyed, they replaced it.Quote:
Originally Posted by mowgli
They have always done this, i think to make up for their oxygen thief son who had done nothing for his kids.
However.........they spoiled their kids AND...still do, so say for example the kids were having a weekend visit, i would say " ok Thomas has been naughty and done this or that, i've told him no treats this weekend" but i am allowing him to come and see you, they would go against my wishes with the excuse of " well he wasn't naughty for us so we won't punish him for nothing".
So i had to threaten to stop visits, like i said earlier, the move 90 miles away was a good excuse to limit visits to Newcastle.
As for recording his out bursts i think i may start doing this, we have a child psychologist to see regarding his ADHD tests ( which i do not think it is, but is deffo something)
TBH i think it is in his genes...seriously his father was a compulsive liar, proper Walter Mitty character and very strange indeed.Quote:
Originally Posted by nova16vxe
Fair enough, hope the troubles dont take too long to sort!Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Stig
Does he ever see his dad? At that age a boys father is still a big influence on his life, whether he is around or not. His attitude may stem from seeing his dad as role model, and trying to be like him, or perhaps rebelling against what he sees as you replacing his father.
If your relationship with your son has simply become that of shouting and telling off, you need to break out of that somehow. Do you do fun stuff together? perhaps just you and him? take him go-karting, to the cinema, even just play computer games with him at home? He should want to behave, not for a fear of being shouted at or smacked, but because if he upsets/dissapoints you, he gets none of your attention or time.
so the 'spoiling' grandparents are on his dad's side???Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Stig
right, then if his dad has feck all to do with your son, they can too....
i imagine that they spend every waking hour filling your son with the bile & other assorted hatred they have for you...
my parents divorced when i was 12, and then proceeded to live about 150 yds from each other, and if my mum thought for any reason i'd been near my dad's house, i'd get 45 minutes of shyte on the subject...........
i didn't know what to believe & wasn't too happy about it.....
It is his dads parents yes, they pay him to spend time with his kids, this grates my liver, the fact my ex hubby is still alive and well when there are more deserving people waiting for his organs annoys the crap out of me.Quote:
Originally Posted by mowgli
I have always fought for him to spend time with his kids, usually through solicitors and it's like flogging a dead horse, i had to just admit defeat and realise that i cannot make him spend time with his kids.
Occasionally he will when his mother tells him to, but as ever work and girlfriends have always been more important.
He is now married, and his new wife has a 5 yr old boy, this does my head in as it must hurt my children no end.
My daughter didn't even want to go to his wedding, now when ever they return from gran and grandads and mention that "dad" was there i hate it, cos they never have anything nice to say about him and i wish he would just disappear.
He took them bowling on sunday, and his new wife spent the day telling them off for talking loud and being noisy as she had a headache, bearing in mind he has seen them maybe 3 times in the 4 months we have lived here.
The CSA have to threaten him with court action to get anything from him for me.
Oh rant over...sowwy..:)
^^^ don't you think your son just misses his dad ?
That could be the cause of it all
Either way I'd try and get it sorted, I was a terrible teenager and looking back if problems were sorted/discussed at the time I probably would have acted different
If he's acting like you have said I wouldn't give him ANY cash as he will be spending it on drink and weed probably for escapism
Which will lead to harder drugs, been there, got in a right state, but managed to pull out of it
sorry, but the thought of someone with a headache in a bowling alley is making me laugh..........