toilet humour

[Davo]

i was appalled when i found this out. heres the scenario, u feel the grumble in ya tum, u think i need go potty.

but just for a grin u weigh yourself before the occurance.

you unleash the brown beast into the water with a splish splash and u feel last night chips, curry, etc coming out.

then after u have done washed ur hands (thats right kids, wash ur hands after because of germs)

then u weigh urself again, and to the shock and horror, your the same weight. now how does that happen? ok, its prob got summits to do with air being the same weight as the excrete.

your thoughts please

[kevw]

ermmmmmmm :lol!:

[locky]

Dunno, but stop talking shit! :D :wink:
Try it wen u av a bigger poo, mite change weight then?

[Davo]

yea but cummon, after a heavy night out, were talkin pizza on way home from clubbin belly full of beer, then in the wmorning u weigh, u dump and still the same :? maybeeee theres a conspiracy with scales?

[Davo]

hmm, these scales are confusing us are they? hmm, micky i think it needs your web design skills to build:

www.conspiring_scales.co.uk

[nathanl]

I have noticed that as well, it is very strange. Another weird one is if you measure how tall you are in the morning then again at night you will be smaller at night. :?: :?: :lol:

[ade]

ok - heres the "scientific" explanation...

ALL scales are bre exposed to the weight watchers club before being sent out to the shops. "Usually" only women weigh themselves as they are "usually" the ones who spend most of their time on diets (as those with birds will know) - as a result, weight watchers have a deal with the scale manufacturers to install special lead weights built into special timing devices - at certain times in the day, the lead weghts are released making you "think" you have lost weight when in fact you haven't - then later they are not so you weigh yourself at normal weight and discover that youve gained a few pounds. That way women join diet clubs, more scales are sold and both scale manufacturers and weight watchers reap the cash benefits whilst women and fat blokes get paranoid and neurotic!
In your dump case Davo - its clear the lead weights were either jammed or were not activated until you went for your dump therefore the resultant dump would have weighed the same as the lead weights being released when you weighed yourself a second time - hence you non weight loss! :o
If you have electronic scales, these things are evil coz they have been programmed to "know" whos using them based on weigt trends and they make the necessary adjustments accordingly - usually once a week when you weight yourself after a starving binge! They go through cycles letting you "think" you are losing weight for about 3 weeks, then they slowly put a bit on to fool you. BAST ARDS!

As for the height problem (and this bit is true) its all to do with your spinal column. When you sleep, you are relaxed and gravity has no real effect on your spine coz you are usually lying down so your muscles relax - making you "bigger". Throughout the day, gravity squasjes your spine - making the plates and muscles closer together. I actually lose 1" in an evening and have to adjust my rear view mirror every time!
To compensate somewhat - during your lunch break, go into the bathroom of your office and hang from the door for 15 minutes (for find any door and hang from it) - this will restretch your spine a little.

God Ive just re read that lot and the scales conspiricy is vrilliant - imao

Ade

[Davo]

i think it does deserve ann robinson to come and sort things out here.

[sweety]

Lol, :lol: What a reply!!!!!!!

[sweety]

Lol, :lol: What a reply!!!!!!!