BIGS
30-11-07, 12:54 PM
A bloke is driving happily along in his car with his girlfriend when
he's pulled over by the Police.
The police officer approaches him and asks: "Have you been drinking
Sir?"
"Why?" asks the man, "Was I driving badly?"
"No" replies the Officer, "you were driving splendidly. It was the
ugly
bird in the passenger seat that made me suspicious"
...
.
.
.
.
.
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.
Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that
would transfer a portion of the mother's labour pain to the FATHER.
He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much
in
favour if it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that
even 10% was probably more pain that the father had ever experienced
before.
But as the labour progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the
doctor
to
go head and bump it up a notch.
The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband
was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husbands' blood
pressure
and
was amazed at how well he was doing.
At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to
feel
quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife
considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the
pain
to
him.
The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her
husband were ecstatic.
When they got home, they found the milkman dead on the porch.
...
.
.
.
.
.
.
A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next
to the barber chair, eating a cake while her dad gets his haircut.
The barber smiles at her and says: "Sweet heart, you're gonna get hair
on your muffin."
"I know" she replies "I'm gonna get tits too."
.....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs
up
on Santa's lap.
Santa asks: "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?"
The little girl replies: "I want a Barbie and Action Man."
Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says: "I thought
Barbie
comes with Ken."
"No," said the little girl "She comes with Action Man, she fakes it
with
Ken."
he's pulled over by the Police.
The police officer approaches him and asks: "Have you been drinking
Sir?"
"Why?" asks the man, "Was I driving badly?"
"No" replies the Officer, "you were driving splendidly. It was the
ugly
bird in the passenger seat that made me suspicious"
...
.
.
.
.
.
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.
Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that
would transfer a portion of the mother's labour pain to the FATHER.
He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much
in
favour if it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that
even 10% was probably more pain that the father had ever experienced
before.
But as the labour progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the
doctor
to
go head and bump it up a notch.
The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband
was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husbands' blood
pressure
and
was amazed at how well he was doing.
At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to
feel
quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife
considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the
pain
to
him.
The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her
husband were ecstatic.
When they got home, they found the milkman dead on the porch.
...
.
.
.
.
.
.
A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next
to the barber chair, eating a cake while her dad gets his haircut.
The barber smiles at her and says: "Sweet heart, you're gonna get hair
on your muffin."
"I know" she replies "I'm gonna get tits too."
.....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs
up
on Santa's lap.
Santa asks: "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?"
The little girl replies: "I want a Barbie and Action Man."
Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says: "I thought
Barbie
comes with Ken."
"No," said the little girl "She comes with Action Man, she fakes it
with
Ken."