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View Full Version : chat up lines !!!!



BIGS
05-03-07, 11:00 PM
1.I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

2.(Lick finger and wipe on her shirt)Let's get you out of these wet clothes

3.You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

4.Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

5.I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

6.I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

7.Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

8.I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

9.Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?

10.You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

11.Are those real?

12.You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

13.(Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

14.You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

15.You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

16.F$@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga

draper
05-03-07, 11:21 PM
do you have an irrational fear of clocks??

*look at you crotch*

well put your face and 2 hands on this !!




lets go home and do all the things im gonna tell everyone wisewood does !

Timmy
05-03-07, 11:34 PM
here's 10p ring you mother tell her your not coming home tonight
I drive a nova

draper
05-03-07, 11:35 PM
i may not be fred flintstone but ill make your bed rock !!

vallanc3
06-03-07, 12:07 AM
get your knickers down love

draper
06-03-07, 12:08 AM
get your knickers down love

scmoooth

vallanc3
06-03-07, 12:11 AM
im from bradford tho..so it works

draper
06-03-07, 12:13 AM
do you even need a chat up line in yorks ?? as lng as your breathing your fair game ;)

vallanc3
06-03-07, 12:16 AM
i dont even think you have to be breathing

london_chris
06-03-07, 07:59 AM
lol im the master of chat up lines, dont really use em much but they always work haha, other day i just came out with this one when i was wnkered which suprised me,
i pulled something out of this girls hair and said its a seed do u want me to go away then, she replied "what no why?" and i said well if you are putting grass seeds in your hair i thought u might of wanted to be a lawn! she couldnt stop laughing which guaranteed a bed for the night lol, bit cheesy but i thought it was good for an off the mark line

london_chris
06-03-07, 08:02 AM
but then being a cockney in somerset lad of farmers and moo cows always guarantees a pull!

Jack
06-03-07, 10:22 AM
"Hi" usually works lol


I drive a nova
That won't work.

Matt2107
06-03-07, 10:39 AM
Slience speaks a thousand words.

BIGS
06-03-07, 11:09 AM
"Hi" usually works lol


That won't work.

your be surprised on my 21st the lads from my work printed a cool art t shirt with a nova on the front and saying dan's 21st bla bkla bla and underneith no.1 nova fan and the amount of girls that came up was unbelivable.

Jack
06-03-07, 11:14 AM
All I'll say is women take a greater interest in my car now I have the Celica lol

loggyboy
06-03-07, 11:15 AM
is that a mirror in your knickers?
because i can see myself in them.

Is that your space ship outside?
Because your out of this world.

Is your dad out of prison yet?
For stealing the stars and putting them in your eyes?

wisewood
06-03-07, 11:25 AM
do you even need a chat up line in yorks ?? as lng as your breathing your fair game ;)

I'm yorkshire - i married welsh. Says it all lol

Novadex
06-03-07, 03:12 PM
Can i have your phone number i lost mine?...

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tacs?

dannyb
06-03-07, 03:16 PM
do you even need a chat up line in yorks ?? as lng as your breathing your fair game ;)

Round this way, it helps if your related to the person your chatting up lol

Alex.
06-03-07, 04:00 PM
I just lower my top (lower then it usually is) and that usually helps.
I shock myself at what chat up line I used to pull Jack, it's very out of character at how forward I was. lol

BigStan
06-03-07, 04:03 PM
I just lower my top (lower then it usually is) and that usually helps.
I shock myself at what chat up line I used to pull Jack, it's very out of character at how forward I was. lol

lol What was it ?

coombsey
06-03-07, 04:06 PM
that tops nice would look better on my bed room floor

Stuart
06-03-07, 04:07 PM
fancy a fcuk

wisewood
06-03-07, 04:10 PM
no thanks, i'll get you pregnant.

Alex.
06-03-07, 04:18 PM
lol What was it ?

Not saying...I was just very forward. ;)

wisewood
06-03-07, 04:20 PM
something to the effect of "fancy sticking your cock between these?"

Alex.
06-03-07, 04:24 PM
HaHaHa lol
No but I'll try that as my next chat up line!

BigStan
06-03-07, 04:32 PM
Not saying...I was just very forward. ;)

Come on please say, it will be fun !

Alex.
06-03-07, 04:43 PM
No because I get embarressed lol

BigStan
06-03-07, 04:53 PM
No because I get embarressed lol

Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaasssssssssssseeeeeeeeeee !

If not tell me in secret and i will post it up on here ! Or better still, Jack can do it !! lol lol lol

Alex.
06-03-07, 05:02 PM
Jack probably won't find it that embarressing and so will probs post it up.
Basically I was house sitting for some neighbours, he came over, at half 11 I said to him..."Well at 12 I plan to go to bed, so you can either come upstairs or go home"....lol. Not that big a deal right? It was for me :p

BigStan
06-03-07, 05:06 PM
Wow you are hot !!! lol lol

But how did he know you was there, was he on the prowl knocking on doors across the village ? lol

Alex.
06-03-07, 05:07 PM
No he came over at about 9. lol

BigStan
06-03-07, 05:10 PM
Nice to see a thread that hasnt been infiltrated by 'the kids' ! lol

Bouch
06-03-07, 06:11 PM
Do you work in Subway? Because you've definately given me a foot long!!!

Driver
06-03-07, 06:22 PM
me : "Fat Penguin"
girl : "You what ?"
me : "Sorry just wanted to say something to brake the ice"

used this one to pull r gert
me : threw penut down her top
her : what you do that for
me : can i get my penut back please ? :D

novaco
06-03-07, 07:24 PM
Jack probably won't find it that embarressing and so will probs post it up.
Basically I was house sitting for some neighbours, he came over, at half 11 I said to him..."Well at 12 I plan to go to bed, so you can either come upstairs or go home"....lol. Not that big a deal right? It was for me :p

lmao!!

i need to meet a girl like you:eek: lol

lee coley
06-03-07, 07:36 PM
get tits out fo lads

dooooney
06-03-07, 11:41 PM
damm mines semy being take

me: excuse me i dunno if you could help me,
her: yea
me: i was just wondering if you know how much a polar bear wieghs
her: most probably er i dunno witha weird look and her freinds laughing
me: well thanks all i know is that it breaks the ice nice to meet you my names .... whats yours.

bit ****e i know but it worked once and thats all i needed it for had it for 3 1/2 years now damm line!!!!!

Pillar
07-03-07, 08:59 AM
your eyes are like spanners .....


my nuts tighten everytime i look at them

Jack
07-03-07, 09:46 AM
Jack probably won't find it that embarressing and so will probs post it up.
Basically I was house sitting for some neighbours, he came over, at half 11 I said to him..."Well at 12 I plan to go to bed, so you can either come upstairs or go home"....lol. Not that big a deal right? It was for me :p
No, it was a case of me purposefully sitting there not doing much but watching TV just to see what you'd try lol

And it wasn't that late, as I'd have got bored and gone home by then :p

Lee
07-03-07, 11:49 AM
I was on a stag night once and we had a bet with one bloke that he couldnt pull anyone by using the line 'Do you want some c0ck?'

We lost lol......... Twice!!

And people say Reading girls are prude!!

Jack
07-03-07, 12:05 PM
I was on a stag night once and we had a bet with one bloke that he couldnt pull anyone by using the line 'Do you want some c0ck?'

We lost lol......... Twice!!
How many blokes did he pull then? lol

I once had a gf in the Reading area. That was a mistake!

Alex.
07-03-07, 02:44 PM
No, it was a case of me purposefully sitting there not doing much but watching TV just to see what you'd try lol

And it wasn't that late, as I'd have got bored and gone home by then :p

It was as the Osbournes started...I remember that much!
And you did offer to keep me company :p

wisewood
07-03-07, 03:06 PM
haha jack is a softie but cant admit it. closet homo.

Matt2107
07-03-07, 03:21 PM
Now I don't get what the big deal is with Reading.
It's not that bad..... just ignore the thing on the news about the bloke who crashed his car after being stabbed in the heart by a "youth."

It was only an MR2 though.... so thats kinda ok.



Just kidding about that last part.

Jack
07-03-07, 10:49 PM
haha jack is a softie but cant admit it. closet homo.
Closet my ****, who's up for some man love lol

Welsh Dan
07-03-07, 10:55 PM
Closet my ****, who's up for some man love lol

Me & flossy. :p

Matt2107
08-03-07, 09:19 AM
Who the ****s flossy?