GET HER BACK UP .

[sickrabbit]

I think in the interests of keepings ones partner on her toes ( and thus not bored and stale ) its important to invigorate the relasionship . I,ve tried to understand women - but alas I,m no wiser , so I thought a new approach needed - either humour , or to annoy - thus giving her something to ponder on , and therefore a small gift in keeping her personality from being stolen, from the likes of Corrie or the Mitchells on BBC1 So tonite I,ve tried both - the jokes didnt work ,so humour was out , but she went total f*ckwit over what I did next. Whilst spending a penny I roared loudly and cursed in German , groaning and sighing like the best German porn film known to man . Now its a fact that some strange people on this dear planet get off on golden rain , but I have to admit - my boss woman aint one of em......and by god - did I find out !!

We,re going to a wedding tommorrow , so i think chatting up a bridesmaid or getting munted and belch everywhere to be the next effort in keeping her- in - doors from getting bored - and on her toes. I think it is my duty.
I am a shining example of modern man - learning to keep his partner happy - in the simpleness of life ...... the hard way.....and at a cost of my future health and safety . But it will give her more than enough to keep the gossip treadmill going with her and her pals.......
I think only those who,ve been tethered to a woman for some time will appreciate this thread.

Ideas please people.

[Rob77]

We,re going to a wedding tommorrow

You could stand up during the ceremony when vicar says "anyone object to the marriage blah blah blah" and reel off a crazy made up story about your secrect love for the groom - and how you, him and the vicar meet up regularly for a bit of gay man love....

Just my input......

Rob.

[Dar]

lol - class :P
I too have taken a similar approach to married life, but on a lesser scale cos my misses is rather fragile and won't give massive abuse. She just crys which in turn makes me feel like a shit. But anyhoo.

One of my faves is to burst in whilst they are on the crapper and chuck cold water over them, then legit! this works best in the morning when they are still a lil sleepy.

Another one I tryed recently is say that im going to sell the kids and put them on eBay. The little one is causing extream lack of sleep and she keeps waking up the 2 year old.

I do this quite often - Start asking for stuff like a cup of coffie or a sandwich. then about 5 seconds later say hurry up (Or something of the sort), just be obnoxious. Keep this up to see what you can get away with. Say you get a sandwich. When they bring it back say nah im not hungry now (At this point you may end up wearing what has been made so don't try it when the coffie comes in).

Also I try and see how far I can make her go for something and how late in the evening. Unfortunatley a MaccyD's at 22:30 is apparently out of the question :evil: I was hungry as well that time.

With me and my missus all this sort of behaviour started when we first met and she would do ANYTHING I asked. Despite what you might think this is not great in a woman. So I told her that if she thinks im being a prick or asking for outragous stuff to tell me to get lost. I then started, at first she didn't get it. But now she knows the score :twisted:

There you have it! this is only a small selection of what I do but most of it is spur of the moment stuff. Tiz good fun :wink:

[Lee]

i find the odd slip, and accidentally poking her up the poo hole keeps her sufficiently on edge :lol:

[sickrabbit]

It has to be variety is the spice of life , so a keen imagination will keep things spicey. Whistling way too loud and out of tune hits the spot ...speshly if its the opening bars of Cliffs summer holiday- repeating it over and over... My brother swears blind on this one - leave empty beer cans beside the loo !! Mind you she got her own back the other week ....I was tucking into my peanut butter sarnies , and was handed a bowl of crisps...not even thinking of why they were in such a container , I stuffed a handful into my mouth - they were marmite flavour . I love marmite , but not with peanut butter ....

just wait till shes in the shower tonite ...I,ll run the hot tap downstairs ....that,ll wake her up - and keep her jolly !!

[sickrabbit]

i find the odd slip, and accidentally poking her up the poo hole keeps her sufficiently on edge :lol:


pmsl .......nowt like the tradesmans entrance to cause mirth and merriement all round.....

[Marc]

i find the odd slip, and accidentally poking her up the poo hole keeps her sufficiently on edge :lol:

one of me mates did that but was an accident (well so he says!) did that and his missus jumped forward and only having thin walls mad a dint in the fucking wall lol

not sure with my missus im 2 soft for me own good and she gets away with a lot of stuff, obviously not well bad stuff like cheating etc she would get dumped. but some of the stuff ive read made me laff and gave me some ideas :twisted: