In need of some Advice

[Anonymous]

Hi

For those who dont know me i live in novaload chat room, sad i know but well well.

neway on train to uni theres this well fit bird i wanna bone, thing is i got fuck all self confidence. sooo i was hoping to get some advice from u peeps as to how to pull this lass.

i know her mates(they went to same secondary school as me) but i dont know then that well, so i dont really wanna say oh hello, ur m8s well fit set us up will ya, kind of thing, they go to college with her so meet up with her on train. i dont know nething about this lass cos im too shy to find out :(

i is pissed off with being too shy so ill do nething u lot recommend as long as i pull this lass.

pls help me out and offer ur words of wisdom to me.

ps she is well fit and this post is serious so no taking the piss pag and mr storey.

thank you

David

[Anonymous]

Shove it up her arse ;)

[Anonymous]

yeah then wipe it on her face!

heres a thought, if her gobs full she cant say no!

Micky@novaload.net :)

[Anonymous]

u sure thats gonna work tho??

i really like this lass :(

back to serious replies pls lol

[Anonymous]

hello david

how fit is she? if she is as fit as u say she is i will sort it out for u whats her number?

[Anonymous]

i dunno her number :( i know sweet feck all about her, apart from shes damn fine.

[Anonymous]

ok first bit of serious advice....ignore anything dicko tells u, u do not need infra red goggles, balaclavas, laptop (for sitting in chat outside her house), hunting knives etc

[Anonymous]

I agree with No Frills and Micky, spill a hot drink over her paps so she has to get her top off then just jump on her.
M8 no one can tell you what to say to her as we don?t know her, try to get eye contact with her, smile at her then look away, wait a wile then look back at her if she looks back at you it?s a good sign, then again she might think what?s that ugly twat looking at, if you know here m8?s go and talk to her about them i.e. if one of her friends isn?t on the train say ?where?s what ever her name is? It?s a minefield talking to birds but just stop being a soft pap and go and talk to her she can only suck you off or tell you to go f**k yourself then laugh at you with all her m8?s


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[Anonymous]

Each and every one is wired up wrong. BUT they do have a few uses, and this one seems to have a use of being pleasant on the eye :) Use the "go through her friends" route, its a great one, and if you dont get her you are very likely to get one of the friends :)

Trust me its a good un, im in the process of working my way through the Ex's best mates like that :D

Dave Pearce, hmm he mixes like a man with no hands

[Anonymous]

lmfao @ ian

ha ha ha ha

hunting knives, fucking classic novaload moment for years to come!

anyways

dave everybodys diffrent and if u dont try then u will never know.

if u dont get the knockbacks then u never learn, just go for it

Micky@novaload.net :)

[Anonymous]

its been a minuite or 2 and im still laffing :p

Micky@novaload.net :)

[Anonymous]

well im not saying a word, who cares about the technique as long as it works!!
Shal i look on my fone see if i have her number dave. hahahaha
Im sure your gonna ask me on chat so i wont bother posting in here :P

[Anonymous]

how bout walkin up 2 her sayin hi pop tart im rich ive got a fcukin bangin nova and a villa in spain wanna fcuk?
what do u boyz fink!!

[Anonymous]

Every heard of a Dirty Sanchez? Hahahaha.

[Anonymous]

Here's 1 that never fails. Abduct/borrow (or rear your own)a sprog. Few months old is about right. Steal a baby sling thing from Mothercare and then strap said sprog onto your chest. Whilst in Mothercare get some Johnson baby talc. and make sure you reek of it. Then act gormless in front of said female ( or females) and contrive to drop dummy/mitten/feed bottle whilst struggling with a push chair. I can absolutley guarantee this. It works on girls and women of all ages. It is a fanny magnet but you must remember key details like names ages teething history else you'll be sussed as an imposter!

[Anonymous]

lmao@Cp, i gotta admit iv been shoping with my m8 who has a kid, he gets hundresed of tasty women askin to look at the kid and chats em up, haha

[Anonymous]

Its the truth. Would I tell you lads wrong??
Check out girlie turn on Video's such as Bridget Jones's diary/ Pride and Prejudice/Knotting Fecking Hill/Pretty Woman/Dirty Dancing. Anything wiv Colin Firth/Hugh Wanker Grant types acting moody/helpless makes nearly all girlies(and their mums) moist.
You got to get into their minds. They like Robby Williams cos he's got "nice eyes and cheeky smile" NOT cos he's gives it to them up the arse, No Frills, you nonce!
:D

[Anonymous]

Tell ya wat m8 just ask her if she takes it up the jotter!, if she says yes u'll spend all day Gan like a fiddlers elbow/like a shit house door in the wind/Doing the horizontal Hokey Pokey ect/ Or failling that show her Cojak in a roll neck jumper! that's bound to impress er!!!

Ps, Hunting knives! Nice!

Twitchin like a pigs eye!

[Anonymous]

In fact dont say Jotter she might slap ya!try "Poo Hoop" or "Tea Towel Holder" or "Balloon Knot" or "Greame Le Saux"

[Anonymous]

let one of her friends know(just in passing) that you think she's nice , she will find out and probably wont think much of it . But if she knows this then its just up to you to smile when you see her and maybe when you let on to her hold her stare for slightly longer than usual...she'll know you like her then and it will be easier to get talking to her. Good luck man and dont listen to none of these punks who dont know how to treat a lady.(joking you guys!!)

[Anonymous]

tell her mates u like her, but be careful to word it so that it doesn't sound like your just after a fook.

when walking past her etc on the train, smile at her (u feel a dick doin it but think of the later pleasures u will receieve :D)
if she smiles back, then game on
if she looks away...just chill for 5 minutes, then look back again...if she keeps sneakily looking over to see if your looking, she's interested.
then she will tell her mates "who's that cute lad on the train?"
and then they could maybe set up a 'date' where u meet her for a drink or whatever...

then when u start goin out wiv her, she'll nag u to fcuk, moan at u, not let you out with your mates. But, she hopefully will milk your plodger.

good luck


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[Anonymous]

cheers peeps, lets see if the advice works when i see her next.

Dave

[Anonymous]

sure youll be fine dave, now we gotta sort out my probs with the chick i like,

but thats another thread.