View Full Version : Mechanical mis-hap storys!
NOVA_LEE
18-10-10, 06:49 AM
right here we go, everyone knows someone who has done something well dodgey or stupidly wrong whilst working on cars let here the storys :D
one of my mates was replaccing his cam in his nova an didnt get the right one to fit his 16 astra engine. the cam he bought was abit too long an obvs for a diff engine so what does he do?????
well he took a chisel to it to make it "fit"
the cam then not sitting propper in place was bouncing around like a fat bird on a pogo stick an yeah car was propper missing an spluttering to feck.
another mate somehow managed to replace his brake pads only to put em in the wrong way round so was metal to metal on the disk
there is some c0cks out there so please tell us ya storys
brownbear
18-10-10, 11:24 AM
I painted one lower side of a nova gloss and the other side matt black....
a mate over tightened a honda nsx gearbox plug, cracked a chunk out of the casting and chem metalled it back up....
ive used a washer bottle full of petrol as a fuel tank when the fuel pump died on my 1.2 carb. pipe into the top of the carb, pull the washer stalk to go, jobs a good 'un.
i saw a workmate snap a flywheel bolt, look at it for 2 secs then coat the back of the head with superglue and glue it into the hole, then fit the clutch and build it up....
the only ones i'm going to mention are non spannering mistakes
1. i saw a mechanic get a blackcurrant drink from the machine, and a drop of red diesel in a drinks machine cup the wrong way round.......he was sick..
2. i know a local fairground bloke who makes all his own rides in a fantastic metalwork shop.. he employs an idiot to sweep up & make the drinks.. the idiot thought 1/2 cup of coffee meant 1/2 cup of nescafe & then the water.. the boss left it on the bench till it was cool & necked it in one, he didn't sleep for a week.
i won't put mechanical mistakes up cos they might be used as ammunition & also, if you've never made a mistake, you've never done anything.
Hmmmmmmm where to start lol
opening my toolbox is normally the first/biggest mistake of the day lol
steg1970
18-10-10, 03:20 PM
About 7 years ago I was preparing my shell for rallying and was crouched in the car removing glue from the inside of the roof. I found the quickest way was to alternate between applying heat from a butane burner in one hand and rubbing with a petrol soaked rag in the other all was going well till my arms went out of sync, you can guess the rest.
NOVA_LEE
18-10-10, 03:53 PM
im sat here pi55ing meself laughing at these lads, keep em coming in........theres loads of nuggets out there
paul james
18-10-10, 04:32 PM
I didn't tighten up one of the brake caliper bolts propelry on my nova after changing the pads and disks. The bolt decided to leave the car when travelling on the motorway, the caliper then slipped out of position, jamming right into the alloy. Could of been nasty, but just ended with one alloy wheel needing replaced.
Had quite a few very close shaves with an angle grinder with a broken switch. The thing tried to kill me several times, even when it worked properly, so I binned it. If inanimate objects can be evil, that one was.
I forgot to put a locking pin in for the crank on a 1.2 corsa when timing it up, 14 valves later all was ok lol
Dropped a 1/4 drive ratchet onto the terminals of a starter motor, it melted and made a lot of smoke. Snap on wouldnt cover it under warrenty, dont know why?
Was pushed down a slope at work and hit the clutch instead of the brake, into the metal girder(sp?) that makes the side of the workshop door head on.
Once put a headgasket on upside down, blocked some coolant jackets, but also blocked the oil feed to the inlet cam. It seized up and snapped the cam pulley woodruff key bending all 8 valves.
Guy i worked with once put a head on, torqued it all down. I walked over when i was an apprentice to see what he was doing, with one question, why did you get 2 headgaskets? The look on his face when he saw the gasket sitting on the bench was priceless lol
getting Lee to put a V6 in a Nova
editted for troof
http://hydrotek.in/gallery/Machines/Jcb/o_jcb3cx_2.jpg
right. i was asked to replace the chisel point in a jcb breaker.... (example pic above)
with the breaker lying on the floor of the workshop, i undid the locating pins, and it wouldn't budge. quick call to the dealership, who said they get a burr, and advised hooking the hydraulic pipes onto the digger & forcing it out... so i tried that.. nothing.
so i knocked it back in with a sledgehammer, and revved the digger up a bit, then pressed the pedal...bang, and it didn't move...
so sledge hammer & even more revs, nothing..
so i got an assistant on the digger, knocked it back in, & yelled rev it up, so full power & ka-fcuking-boom, the point (40 odd kg) shot out, went straight under the digger, out the workshop door, and off down the yard like an exocet missile. we ended up getting it from the next field.
I've seen an apprentice air-gun head bolts/spark plugs in.
Also seen a mk2 astra that was low on oil, old dear topped it up till she could see it in cam box, ran for 5 miles (i still can't work out how!) before it ended in an oily mess.
Also heard a story bout a guy fitting cambelts at volvo iirc, were quite tight fitting, so he cut slits in one side of them to make them easier to push over the cam pulley.
vauxluva
18-10-10, 07:48 PM
When i was younger i put a long reach plug in a 2 stroke field bike.....nasty hole in my piston, ouch! my dad still does not let me live it down to this day.
Boy i know took a wheel off a car without jacking it up lol
I took engine out my nova with two scisser jacks and at the critical moment the jacks gave way car landing about 1mm from my feet and i was in normal shoes lol
Guy i know that worked at hawco's done a service to a polo then road tested it and the engine seized, Forgot to put oil in it lol
http://hydrotek.in/gallery/Machines/Jcb/o_jcb3cx_2.jpg
right. i was asked to replace the chisel point in a jcb breaker.... (example pic above)
with the breaker lying on the floor of the workshop, i undid the locating pins, and it wouldn't budge. quick call to the dealership, who said they get a burr, and advised hooking the hydraulic pipes onto the digger & forcing it out... so i tried that.. nothing.
so i knocked it back in with a sledgehammer, and revved the digger up a bit, then pressed the pedal...bang, and it didn't move...
so sledge hammer & even more revs, nothing..
so i got an assistant on the digger, knocked it back in, & yelled rev it up, so full power & ka-fcuking-boom, the point (40 odd kg) shot out, went straight under the digger, out the workshop door, and off down the yard like an exocet missile. we ended up getting it from the next field.
lol lol i know what there like to.. must of been one of them scared moments then lol when it comes to a stop.. in next field:thumb:
Trapped my fingers in a alternator whilst the engine was idle'ing.
Dropped a few rocker cover nuts/washers into a 8v engine but built the motor up anyway & ran if for nearly 2 years fine.
Went off roading in a Saxo VTR at 70ish
Put a motorbike battery in a microwave.
Had an accident with some spring compressors & got took out buy a Peugeot Partner top mount :(
Also seen a mk2 astra that was low on oil, old dear topped it up till she could see it in cam box, ran for 5 miles (i still can't work out how!) before it ended in an oily mess.
guy i know who works AA went out to similar last year but the car wouldnt even start lol
vauxluva
18-10-10, 07:58 PM
Put a motorbike battery in the microwave? may i ask the reasoning please dont say to charge it up.........
Put a motorbike battery in the microwave? may i ask the reasoning please dont say to charge it up.........
Science with Mike. Done it with loads of cool stuff.
16v Nova Kev
18-10-10, 08:00 PM
im good at changing cv's and forgetting to put the cv boot on first:tard: and also the caliper spring clip thing i usually find that once i have the wheels back on:roll:
vauxluva
18-10-10, 08:06 PM
Also bought a second hand set of dampers off a low milage k plate (bad idea i do no) took the old feckt one off , got talking to a mate about how id love to put a xe in her ect ect then proceeded to put the old one back on.
nothing major for me tbh.
left wheel bolts undone, that was scary!
fitting a new window reg for the golf, plugged it in to test it, pressed up, and it just shot of its runners and destroyed its self. no funny.
at work, we have a 2 ton mill. old school mohoosive thing.
one day before i was there, they were having a move around, mill on the fork lift, coolant spills, gets on the forks, and the mill falls off. the biggest bang ever apprantly.
mate snapped a 32mm drill bit at work.
mate snapped a 32mm drill bit at work.[/quote]
i've seen that done before. was very lucky not to get shards in face..
andy_mk3
18-10-10, 08:26 PM
Someone I work with was working on a fiesta, he left a rag in the inlet to stop any rubbish getting in. Put it all back together, forgetting about the rag he starts it up and the engine ingests it :D Needed a new engine lol
mate snapped a 32mm drill bit at work.
Nice :cool:
I seen some one leave a chuck key in a 4 jaw chuck on a massive lathe (12" swing over bed, so a proper one like) an start it! Pant ****tingly scary.
Also seen a top mount go through a breeze block wall. Partly my fault lol
Ive seen one of the techies at work leave the timing tools in the cam pulleys after doing the belt on a scenic, keycard renaults try to fire up again and again for about 30 seconds after youve pressed the button lol
Bye bye all 16 valves, one cam, the new belt and tensioner and the head iirc, oops :p
Austin.J
18-10-10, 10:06 PM
Using a lathe similar to this & didn't check if the chuck was tight... at 1500 rpm they fly off pretty well.
http://www.akmachinery.com/images/MetalWorking/RIMG0120.jpg
Also seen a mk2 astra that was low on oil, old dear topped it up till she could see it in cam box, ran for 5 miles (i still can't work out how!) before it ended in an oily mess.
you reminded me of a bbq at my dads.... there was this chugging sound & a smell like a traction engine coming slowly up the rd.....i look over the hedge to see 2 young lads in a mk2 astra.. it had a smoke trail like a papal election....
they stopped & popped the bonnet, and poured some more oil in the engine, then started it up again, one of them yelled, the oil light is still on, put some more in... i said to my dad 'i've got to tell them'.... he said 'no, if they're that stupid, they won't listen anyway', so i carried on drinking
NOVA_LEE
19-10-10, 01:38 AM
ive broke a gsi top tint tryna take it off,
spent 6 hours tryna get me bump strips off with all the crappy glue.
dangerously cut all 4 springs in half on me nova saloon in me dafter younger days
painted the lower half of the doors of me red nova in hammerite an cable tied the bumers on haha was 17 like
Deanosri
19-10-10, 11:01 AM
I know a lad who changed a wheel bearing on his motor and only put the wheel nuts in finger tight. Obviously he got about 1/4 mile up the road and the wheel came offlol I started walking back down the road to look for the nuts/studs and the wierd thing was they were all evenly spaced apart!! ish
chris my mate with the clio/vectra didnt tighten my wheels up properly and all four wheels came loose. I had to stop and walk about 2miles back to his house to get a wheel brace.
Dave another mate threaded the rear gearbox mount on one of my novas
i had an xe nova with a running fault it just wouldnt start, so i checked everythingeventually ended up thinking it was the wiring to the injectors, so I took the inlet off and asked my brother who was 11 at the time to just turn the key to pos 2 to prime the pump and give it a really quick on and off. He kept cranking it for about 10 seconds after me shouting stoppp and it set on fire lol.
Killed pretty much everything in the engine bay, bonnet etc I still sold the engine for £200 cleaned up without a loom pmsl.
Started up a mk1 clio without torqueing up the bottom pully bolt, iirc done 6 of the 8 valves.
Had brakes apart, half worn, pushed the pistons back in the calipers, put it all together, then drove off straight up the road without pumping the brake pedal first, you can guess i shat myself when the pedal went to the floor.
Thats all i can think of so far, prob know loads more though.
ben doodar
19-10-10, 04:29 PM
i know a lad who had an old mini with stupidly wide arches and standard steel wheels. he turned the wheels inside out so they filled the arches........
i know a lad who had an old mini with stupidly wide arches and standard steel wheels. he turned the wheels inside out so they filled the arches........
lol lol, we were saying to some lad to do this the other night whos got a golf with some mahoosive bolt on arches but with standard 13inch steels lol
rayginghorn
19-10-10, 04:42 PM
when i was 16 a had a race rep 50cc (derby gpr 50r) and i didnt have the money for the front pads which was fine untill i raced a freind round some country roads and had forgot about it so as i pulled the lever just befor a 90 degree left hander and nothing happened all i could do was straighten up and go though a hedge at about 40 mph managed to stay on as well
Maxfield
19-10-10, 04:46 PM
I know a lad who once used copper pipe as wheel spacers, drove round like that until he sold the car.
I once left a cambelt tensioner pin in, drove it round for the night, then remembered in the middle of the night I never took it out, took it out the next day and was still fine.
so i couldn't hold on, and had to put a few on....
we had a tractor driver, who claimed to be a mechanic... he changed the oil on his tractor, and bearing in mind that he used a 25L drum to catch the oil in & the tractor only had 17L of oil, he managed to get most of it on the workshop floor. he jammed the funnel into the top of the drum so hard, air couldn't get past, and the oil overflowed everwhere. he then refilled the engine, and drove out of the workshop, thus running old engine oil all over the yard too.....
we've had people forget the pit was there, and have a sudden reminder... set fire to themselves with oxy acetylene or grinders....dickies farmer overalls are fantastically flammable.....
my own was when i was fitting a secondhand towbar, one of the bolts didn't line up, so i gave it one with a 2lb Ball pein hammer.. it bounced off the bracket, smacked me on the top lip & snapped my top 2 front teeth off at the gum line.......i still can't bite sellotape 13 years on...
my own was when i was fitting a secondhand towbar, one of the bolts didn't line up, so i gave it one with a 2lb Ball pein hammer.. it bounced off the bracket, smacked me on the top lip & snapped my top 2 front teeth off at the gum line.......i still can't bite sellotape 13 years on...
wasnt tempted to axe it up lol
not a mis-hap but a bodge on my old escort, id broke an engine mount (the rubber insert) but wanted to go to a kroooooze that night (the car was puling the driveshaft out when the engine moved)
1 piece of dowling later and the engine mount didnt move and made the kroooooze (and a few wheelspins yo)
Ive done a few dodgy things lol
Years ago i was rebuilding a Golf with a mate, we had just sprayed it, and fitted the 17's to check for scrub. Best way to check, we reasoned, was to go for a test drive. Think we got up to about 60mph, both sitting on milk crates, no glass, nothing but a dash and steering wheel. Got back and realised we had put the wheels on with two bolts and done them up finger tight. How they didn't come off I have no idea!
Llandow one year, finished the day with a tappy engine. Found out it had eaten a big end bearing. Removed shells, crank journal was scored and shaped like a rugby ball, but i refitted some new shells anyway as i had another track day. Engine lasted one lap:) I was expecting at least two lol
When I repaired Jacks leaky oil cooler on the V6, we didn't have any seals for the outlets, so I put some washers under the cooler to push it up to the right height, and squashed it down with some liquid gasket. Still doesnt leak :)
Ive done a few dodgy things lol
I was going to quote that and just post a pic of the saloon lol
Derick-Sport
19-10-10, 07:02 PM
had a work experience lad who had a civic on a ramp when i used to work at honda i told him to 'wizz' the sump plug off and give pull the drainer underneath.... gets the windy gun out already set on tighten gives it a frap.. looks over confused still holding the gun up to the sump with an oh **** look on his face as 4 litres of oil pours down the gun over his arms then face.
left him till it was fully drained to lol
apprentices/work experience when they get hold of an air gun, the look on their face is priceless, any chance they get "can i use the air gun?" lol
apprentices/work experience when they get hold of an air gun, the look on their face is priceless, any chance they get "can i use the air gun?" lol
i still do that at 26 lol
MattBrown
19-10-10, 07:16 PM
One of my biggest was Monday in work
2 hours of gig welding with my overalls slightly open!
My chest is on fire at the minute!
Erm, forgot to put the rubber block of my fuel pump, tightened it up, and snapped the finger off, had to get it out of the sump later on lol
Snapped a spoke in a pushbike, then removed others so make them symmetrical lol
MattBrown
19-10-10, 07:19 PM
apprentices/work experience when they get hold of an air gun, the look on their face is priceless, any chance they get "can i use the air gun?" lol
I'm a 3rd year apprentice and I use it whenever I can lol
turnipheed
19-10-10, 07:53 PM
i was welding a old metro as an apprentice and finished the bit on the sill and went and sat down to have my bait with the boss and the other 2 mechanics when after about 5 min we wondered why the garage wasnt clearing of smoke a bloody lump of sound dedening caught hold inside the quarter panel and burnt the paint off the quarter and melted the seatbelt and quarter trim i wasnt popular !!!!!
i once fitted a towbar to a rav4 iirc
came to cutting the bumper for a snug fit and it was the best/cleanest cut id done as i was new. shame it was th etop of th ebumper and not the bottom lol
ben doodar
19-10-10, 08:45 PM
A lad i know worked at a ford dealers and changed the front pads on quite a newish fiesta. He didn't pump the brake pedal up came out of the workshop down the grass bank and into the side of the burns show room. Smooth!!!
Me and a mate removed the gas struts off a tailgate on his metro. It hit us on the head. Ouch!!
There's plenty more I can't think off right now.
I was going to quote that and just post a pic of the saloon lol
lol
danderv
19-10-10, 09:05 PM
my own was when i was fitting a secondhand towbar, one of the bolts didn't line up, so i gave it one with a 2lb Ball pein hammer.. it bounced off the bracket, smacked me on the top lip & snapped my top 2 front teeth off at the gum line.......i still can't bite sellotape 13 years on...
lol i can't stop laughing at that mowgli that must have funking hurt.
lol i can't stop laughing at that mowgli that must have funking hurt.
you could not get close to imagining the pain, and i'm the bloke who smashed my knee up, got it screwed together & when i came round, i asked the doctors to remove the morphine drip.
the only other thing that hurt as much was when i was in my late 20's and had to be circumcised (minor accident type thing) and my dog jumped on my lap
Mowgli, you are a legend.
end off.
end off
freudian slip or deliberate??
my own was when i was fitting a secondhand towbar, one of the bolts didn't line up, so i gave it one with a 2lb Ball pein hammer.. it bounced off the bracket, smacked me on the top lip & snapped my top 2 front teeth off at the gum line.......i still can't bite sellotape 13 years on...
just reading this has made my teeth go all funny :tard: i cannot even begin to imagine the pain :eek:
Mowgli, you are a legend.
end off.
lol lol lol lol :p
NOVA_LEE
20-10-10, 02:02 AM
i once changed some alloys on my nova from some corsa alloys to some vec alloys, an after driving for bout 2 days this knoking developed presumed it was a cv joint an when i come to paint my callipers i turned all 8 nuts on the front 2 tyres an within 5 little turns they was in my hand:(
robertdevlin69
20-10-10, 09:01 PM
my mate put too much oil in his car,i arrived at his house to find him tryin to syphon oil with a piece of garden hose threw the cam cover
i lol'd so hard
NOVA_LEE
29-10-10, 12:08 AM
me mate was bulding up a nova from a shell an it was my job workking on the inside tryna get rid of the sound proofing tar stuff in the foot wells,my was was with a hammer an a screwdriver an it came off in chipped bits, hittin the screwy a few times an thought ang on sticking in the tar stuff abit much, only hammerd a hole throught the shell in the drivers foot well haha
i had a golf g60 and i had a oil leak. On my return from work garage next door that was doing the work for me said they fix said leak. Then they proceeded to show me how he found the leak which was the oil pressure sender buy putting brake cleaner on the sender to show me where the oil was running at this point i looked and the ht lead was arching out on the block then the brake cleaner proceeded to set on fire I could not believe my eyes as my car was on fire to say that lad did not stay there very long was a understatement lucky there was no damage as they had a fire extinguisher close by and the guy that owns the garage was a close friend
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