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let_nova
05-05-10, 09:48 AM
edit....fail. will sort later


A manager at a General Store is teaching a young, newly hired boy how to sell people more than they really want. Suddenly, a man walks in asking for a bag of lawn seed. The manager walks up to him and says, “Of course. But you will want a lawn mower, too, right?”
The man asks, “Why would I be?”
The manager replies, “Because when the lawn seed grows, you’ll need something to cut the grass with.”
Surprisingly, the man buys a lawn mower. Then another man walks in and asks for a box of Tampax. The manager nudges the newly hired boy. The boy walks up to the man and says, “Right away, Sir. But, of course, you will want a lawn mower with that, right?”
The shocked man asks, “Why?!”
The young man then replies, “Well, your weekend’s screwed, so you might as well mow the lawn.”

Tommy_nova
05-05-10, 10:16 AM
Girl says to boyfriend ''you make love like you decorate'' he replies ''what...slow with smooth strokes & professional finish?' ''no'' she replies ''more like the bloody Council, you just bang it up, leave a right mess & I have to finish the f**king job myself!!

Tommy_nova
05-05-10, 10:19 AM
paddy painting house, wife walks in and can't believe paddy doing so well.But to her surprise he's hot and the sweat is dripping. She asks "why are you wearing a leather jacket and a parka?" he says "hello, read the ****ing tin. It says for best results put on two coats!

Tommy_nova
05-05-10, 10:21 AM
A boy watches his mam & dad avin sex he ask what are you doin his dad replies making you a brother or sister. Little boy says do her doggy style i want a puppy!


Sorry there abit crap lol

Stuart
05-05-10, 10:25 AM
too much text type for them to be credible lol

Tommy_nova
05-05-10, 10:30 AM
lol opps sorry edited

wwmnw
05-05-10, 10:57 AM
paddy painting house, wife walks in and can't believe paddy doing so well.But to her surprise he's hot and the sweat is dripping. She asks "why are you wearing a leather jacket and a parka?" he says "hello, read the ****ing tin. It says for best results put on two coats!

lol I like that one.

Tommy_nova
05-05-10, 11:18 AM
:thumb:

Cle
05-05-10, 03:30 PM
lmfao there excelent lol