View Full Version : mowgli's pub car facts/bullsh!t thread
please post here the car 'facts' that have ever been told to you in a pub......
one night i drove my brother to a pub in his 205gti1.9, to be told by the pub expert that 'oohh they are really dangerous on the limit' he nearly shat himself when i stuck him in it to show him the 'limit'
toyotas carina & fords mondeo had the same bodyshell
you can fit all the turbo stuff off a golf diesel onto a petrol one as it is a straight fit......
nova 2L 16V
22-02-10, 07:39 PM
****
Dan Stanley
22-02-10, 07:43 PM
A mate of mine once tried arguing that drum brakes were more efficient than disc brakes! I think he had misunderstood something his (motorsport engineering) tutor had told him. He was pretty pished off when three of us put him in his place! hahahaha..
an astra G 2.2 16 with chipped ecu (180hp iirc) would smoke my XE nova...
the fact that i have 170ish hp and about 450 kilo's lighter wouldn't stop him from smoking my a$$
Bobminda
22-02-10, 08:12 PM
Bloke once told me he owned a Cossie for over two weeks and didnt need to rebuild it..........some people are just full of itlol
the brakes on a standard nissan sunny gtir (14" wheels) can handle upto 400 BHP!!!!
eh...........no.
a 500 brake evo can and did over 170MPH, funny as it had a std box and the gearing limits it to 156ish mph. he must of defied psyics.
My mates got a turbo swift gti, from factory. it was a 1.3 gti twincam non turbo the kid was 100% it was a turbo it didnt even sound turbod lol.
Xe novas handle :P that was another good un i got told lol :P
I once got told to spray a fine mist of water over a freshly finish paint job... PMSL ha ha ha ha.
jesus there are loads of bull**** tales ive been told pmsl.
i was told i look good in a nova :(
A guy with his standard mk5 golf gti said he had 170mph out of it and the same guy sold the golf and bought a focus st and told me it was 390bhp when i asked what had been done to it to reach that power he said it had a "stage 3 air filter on it"! lol
i was told a welded diff will kill small children and eat the ozone whole. think he was angry that his 500 quid nismo diff didnt skid as well as my migger!
Kid i worked with today told me he hit the limiter at 165mph in his e36 318
i was told my mate got off the clock in 3rd in his 2.0 8v cav.
i was told my mate got off the clock in 3rd in his 2.0 8v cav.
lol he must need a new speedo cable
an astra G 2.2 16 with chipped ecu (180hp iirc) would smoke my XE nova...
the fact that i have 170ish hp and about 450 kilo's lighter wouldn't stop him from smoking my a$$
1.6 mk5 astra will take my 1.6 nova apparently, because it's been unnoticably "tuned" (standard manifolds, filter etc on it lol) apparently it's probably about 140bhp! :o
A lad in my local was selling a Yamaha DTR 125 field bike which "lifted up in every gear,had powerbands in every gear and did about 120"
I laughed so hard i nearly vomited.
let_nova
22-02-10, 08:48 PM
i was told speedlines werent standard on a nova. pfft how wrong
A lad in my local was selling a Yamaha DTR 125 field bike which "lifted up in every gear,had powerbands in every gear and did about 120"
I laughed so hard i nearly vomited.
yeah those powerbands are murder to fit aswell lol lol
Bobminda
22-02-10, 08:54 PM
i was told speedlines werent standard on a nova. pfft how wrong PMSLlol
George g
22-02-10, 09:13 PM
a mate once told me that he had a dump valve for his 205 1.9GTI to make the gear box breathe better...
i was told speedlines werent standard on a nova. pfft how wrong
that same guy told me that there where no other wheels then speedlines, cesario's and cavslabs.
is the 49mm et just a myth??
Saloony is a vaux techy.
RX8's need steel rods to get to 400bhp
the Nova 1.2 sting came in two spec levels, 118 bhp and 125bhp (the only difference was the tyres....) ;) proper oldies will remember that giggle
i heard this one a few weeks ago.. i really doubt it, but the guy's into that japanese crap..
stock 1jz-gte internals (2.5 vvti engine, supra mk3) can handle 450ish hp.
Asa-James
22-02-10, 10:05 PM
RX8's need steel rods to get to 400bhp
funking epic lol
16v Nova Kev
22-02-10, 10:13 PM
ass/hole walks into my work and says.
oh my son had a nova for on the track like yours it was standard xe but remapped to 200bhp.
i said your son is my fukking hero.
i once asked a mate who had just bought a new socket set, what size set is it, 1/4, 3/8 or 1/2, he replies i dunno they only have mm's on them no 1/4 or 1/2 lol
putting water in your engine to flush out the oil was a good idea, and running it for a few mins
i heard this one a few weeks ago.. i really doubt it, but the guy's into that japanese crap..
stock 1jz-gte internals (2.5 vvti engine, supra mk3) can handle 450ish hp.i really really wouldnt be at all suprised if that was right
i really really wouldnt be at all suprised if that was right
I don't doubt it either tbh, very normal for jap stuff to run that kinda power on standard internals!
Jon_nova1
22-02-10, 11:28 PM
It may be right, The mazda familia 4x4 (what i have) can get to 300-350BHP on standard internals, its only a 1.8 turbo lol
my mate was convinced all ford mondeos were rwd
oh how wrong he was !!! lol
craig green
23-02-10, 12:47 AM
Gas flowed pistons. chipped Nova SR. Lightened & balanced cylinder head.
If you lay the back seats down in a corsa c it reduces the weight and makes it faster lol
If you lay the back seats down in a corsa c it reduces the weight and makes it faster lol
Reduces the centre of gravity and yes, sadly it would in fact theoretically make it marginally faster round a corner... of course most of the people repeating this don't have a clue what or why they're saying lol
a guy from my work that has just got back from a long sickness break asked me today why I have given up on sporty cars after he clocked my estate
Last time he saw me I was driving a 1.2 nova with an exhaust... Sporty? lol
vauxluva
23-02-10, 05:31 AM
haha that is nothing a guy i no recons he could turn a mk6 1300i escort into rear wheel drive using only the exzaust channel for the prop shaft,,say wat,,,,,,jog on pal
I was told the other day that Dar can reach the porn mags on the top shelf lol
General Baxter
23-02-10, 07:48 AM
he has to ask he bigger men for help lol
for the thread
im not going to kill the 5 door
dumpycorsa
23-02-10, 08:12 AM
Not sure whether to believe this one - A nova will handle better with a one piece rear bench seat than it will with a split rear seat.
A bloke from work told me Audi TT's were called TT's because they were twin turbos!
Fcukin crank! lol
peester
23-02-10, 09:04 AM
XE and LET's can be bored out to a 2.1.. regal convinced a mate of mine his was a 2.2!!
pikey1986
23-02-10, 09:23 AM
a lad i work with thinks by adding a 'chip' from a 1.6 corsa to his 1.2 will make it as fast as my standard e16se, i switched off at this point and whenever he speaks to me all i hear is bullsh*t lol
Jon_nova1
23-02-10, 10:42 AM
twin turbo on a 1.4 rover 214....need i say anymore? lol
If you lay the back seats down in a corsa c it reduces the weight and makes it faster lol
lol that was a Copper on VXROnline before he bought a VXR. Reckoned that laying the seats down made a difference on the quarter mile :roll:
He also said at one point that having clay bar'd, polished and waxed the Corsa it was now more aerodynamic and therefore faster.
Epic moron.
XE and LET's can be bored out to a 2.1.. regal convinced a mate of mine his was a 2.2!!
Brett's 2.2 LET Cav lol
lol that was a Copper on VXROnline before he bought a VXR. Reckoned that laying the seats down made a difference on the quarter mile :roll:
He also said at one point that having clay bar'd, polished and waxed the Corsa it was now more aerodynamic and therefore faster.
Epic moron.
the GE Lightening was good for a few Knots more airspeed when fully polished/waxed... lol
oh more pub bullsheets, The VX220 is for hetros.
theres a field full of new novas in spain....
heard in a pub in hull "he's fitted a zetec head to his kent motor, fast as fook mate...."
heard on PNg, V6's into many other things... :p
ps you ask to be deleted, so dont bitch when your account access goes walkies ;)
heard on png " *nazi edit* "
i pay my membership. unless your gonna refund me it, banning for no reason is just b/s dude.
LMAO Stu.
I heard there's a V6 mk1 Cavalier build and full resto happening on these very pages.
joff-turbo-nova
23-02-10, 01:00 PM
Over heard two chavs at PVS 09 when looking at some Cavalier Turbos .......
"wow - I thought they only put these engines in Nova's and Corsa's" lol lol
Joff
Lancia (Beta's) were already rusting before they were painted? lol
lol that was a Copper on VXROnline before he bought a VXR. Reckoned that laying the seats down made a difference on the quarter mile :roll:
He also said at one point that having clay bar'd, polished and waxed the Corsa it was now more aerodynamic and therefore faster.
Epic moron.
I knew someone would remember/know what i was on about lmfao lol
a mate once told me that he had a dump valve for his 205 1.9GTI to make the gear box breathe better...
A mate of mine tried telling me the dump valve went on the gearbox, I told him it didn't he said yes it does it lets out the air when you change gear lollollol
I thought the folding seats flat debate was due to 'weight distribution' gains. lol
From what i remember it was simply a case of the guy saying lay your seats down and it will make your car faster, fact lol
a local lad once reasoned scoobies had that noise because of an induction kit, to prove it he bought a induction kit for his 1.1 fezzy. when fitted showed us all how it now sounded like a scooby :tard:
Another classic is this scenario.
Noob - "How fast does that go?"
Me - Honest answer "I've seen 125 on the clocks, but they're not that accurate, none are"
Noob - "It says 150 on the clock that's how fast it will go"
"My dads Skyline does 300mph"
Me - "You mean it says 300 on the clocks, and it's KPH not MPH. About 185 mph but 90% of them won't touch that for numerous reasons"
Noob - "Nah his does 300mph"
ect etc.
Another classic is this scenario.
Noob - "How fast does that go?"
Me - Honest answer "I've seen 125 on the clocks, but they're not that accurate, none are"
Noob - "It says 150 on the clock that's how fast it will go"
"My dads Skyline does 300mph"
Me - "You mean it says 300 on the clocks, and it's KPH not MPH. About 185 mph but 90% of them won't touch that for numerous reasons"
Noob - "Nah his does 300mph"
ect etc.
Lmfaoo what an idiot lol
GRUNT 16V
23-02-10, 01:52 PM
I Was Told That A Astra Mk2 1.3 Will Do 125mph!!!!!!!! Hahahahahaha
i heard this one a few weeks ago.. i really doubt it, but the guy's into that japanese crap..
stock 1jz-gte internals (2.5 vvti engine, supra mk3) can handle 450ish hp.
can take more even.
If you replace the exhaust on a Mazda 323 GTR you can free up 60 bhp.
I can't remember how much you do get, but it's a lot!
General Baxter
23-02-10, 02:20 PM
i pay my membership. unless your gonna refund me it, banning for no reason is just b/s dude.
i will
heard on png " *nazi edit* "
i pay my membership. unless your gonna refund me it, banning for no reason is just b/s dude.you've asked to be deleted!!! so what difference does it make if you get banned. plus there is usually a genuine reason lol
Sombody told me there was a club for "Performance Nova's"
General Baxter
23-02-10, 02:45 PM
PCG lol
All i will say Baxter is this
5 door
End off lol
General Baxter
23-02-10, 02:52 PM
whats not performance about that lol
I Was Told That A Astra Mk2 1.3 Will Do 125mph!!!!!!!! Hahahahahaha
Yeah thats true................................if it was pushed off a cliff lol
put your willies away, i'm after pub bull****.......
for example
the wifes friend once spent hours in a pub telling me all about how incredible his audi quattro was & how fast it went etc....
little did he know that when i'd nipped for a slash, i had looked under the back end to see there was no diff...oops he'd paid top whack for a 100 coupe..
stupot89
23-02-10, 05:34 PM
lol
vauxluva
23-02-10, 05:39 PM
lol
put your willies away, i'm after pub bull****.......
for example
the wifes friend once spent hours in a pub telling me all about how incredible his audi quattro was & how fast it went etc....
little did he know that when i'd nipped for a slash, i had looked under the back end to see there was no diff...oops he'd paid top whack for a 100 coupe..lol surly buying a car of that performace and cost,you would have thought they did ther home work a lil bit more ??:p :cuckoo: lol
Tractors have right of way
White van men are competant behind the wheel
Tractors have right of way
White van men are competant behind the wheel
lol lol lol lol
lol lol surly buying a car of that performace and cost,you would have thought they did ther home work a lil bit more ??:p :cuckoo: lol
he was both a tw@t & a poser, and he seemed to know everything
I was once told XE Novas were fast. http://www.totalmotorcycle.com/BBS/images/smilies/roll2smilie.gif
General Baxter
23-02-10, 10:50 PM
I was once told 1.2 Novas were fast. http://www.totalmotorcycle.com/BBS/images/smilies/roll2smilie.gif
fixed:thumb:
blue_peg_16v
23-02-10, 10:57 PM
after beating a scooby on the drag strip the bloke jumped out and claimed its down on power because hed fitted a performance exhaust and because its not been chiped it causes it to loose power that was back in 1998 when i had a standard valver with an exhaust so mine must of been down on power too as no chip lol nedless to say i laughed and walked off
Jon_nova1
24-02-10, 12:03 AM
If you replace the exhaust on a Mazda 323 GTR you can free up 60 bhp.
I can't remember how much you do get, but it's a lot!
dude, thats no BSlol
after you've changed the exhaust, intercooler and air filter your looking at upgrading the fuel pump because the standard one can't cope your also looking at broken gearboxes quite oftenlol
dude, thats no BSlol
after you've changed the exhaust, intercooler and air filter your looking at upgrading the fuel pump because the standard one can't cope your also looking at broken gearboxes quite oftenlol
I recall reading it in Banzai or JP years back, think it was Kes' black one in the feature.
I don't remember reading about the fuel pump or FMIC, but it makes sense. I just thought their 60bhp was a bit optimistic for an exhaust - and I was right. lol
Still very impressive though! Time for a GT4 'box. lol
Jon_nova1
24-02-10, 11:27 AM
I've never read banzai, but i know the Kes your talking about, he was unhappy when he took his car to RC developments and ONLY got 400BHP running at one bar lol
It depends how free flowing the exhaust is, its not actually the exhaust that gives the extra power, its the better flowing exhaust that lets the turbo boost higher, a decent flowing exhaust would give you around an extra half a bar of boost;)
got a GT4 conversion set up for mine, not looking forward to it thoughlol
I've never read banzai, but i know the Kes your talking about, he was unhappy when he took his car to RC developments and ONLY got 400BHP running at one bar lol
It depends how free flowing the exhaust is, its not actually the exhaust that gives the extra power, its the better flowing exhaust that lets the turbo boost higher, a decent flowing exhaust would give you around an extra half a bar of boost;)
got a GT4 conversion set up for mine, not looking forward to it thoughlol
this thread is to celebrate the incompetent twaddle spouted over the top of a beer glass.. please keep this technical talk to a minimum
Jon_nova1
24-02-10, 12:16 PM
erm.....erm......no sorry, its gone lol
Asa-James
24-02-10, 01:16 PM
A lad I used to work with (he was a valeter) on his punto GT, quicker than standard
"it's been chipped (believeable), smaller pulley(eh?) and the valves have been rotated 180 degrees(ROFLMYWTF)"
needless to say I don't speak to him anymore
brownbear
25-02-10, 12:46 PM
"That lads got one of them G60's... You know the supercharged ones.."
(he announced this at the back of my car, Where the G60 and the Supercharged badge is)
"No come here i'll show you the charger... you can fit them on any car. It's like a electric motor that you bolt onto the engine that's why it whines.. and you see that belt it goes to the cam belt and that makes the engine spin faster".... Pause to see my very confused face.
"I'm gonna put one on my golf" Walks awak...
I will never open my bonnet at a car park meet again...
brownbear
25-02-10, 12:47 PM
Oh and apparently in Ireland there is a field full of de loreans that will never rust because they are made of Stainless Steel but can't be sold because the government own them...
Jim Mcrae
25-02-10, 01:47 PM
My mate used to be convinced the BMW X5 did 190mph.
Vauxhall made an engine with the engine code.. RedTop and also a RedTop turbo
just remembered another one i was once told... if you fit a redtop into a nova, the handling will be crap.. to fix this, you simply move the engine & box back 2 inches........
Taking a C20XE out of a calibra and putting it in a Nova will increase the bhp from 150 to 200.
8 valve engines have better torque lower down.
ERMMMMM
8 valve engines do have good low down torque
its the air restriction from the 8 less valves that does the trick
So 2.0 8 valves have better low down torque than 2.0 16 valves?
@ mowgli, correct, but thats heading towards the dark art of port and chamber shape affecting airspeed and flow.
btw, if you fit a diesel gearbox to an xr3i it willout run a cossie....
yes bathbun, ever so slightly. and its torque that turns the wheels mate. ;)
btw, if you fit a diesel gearbox to an xr3i it willout run a cossie....
thank god for some proper bull****, it was getting technical again......
how about those early f10 gearboxes where they blanked off the 5th gear????
yes bathbun, ever so slightly. and its torque that turns the wheels mate. ;)
Wow, no ****? lol
A mate told me he was at santa pod a while back and C20LET Nova's were doing 16 secs, a TVR did a 16 sec but his 106 Rallye did a 15 so he would beat C20LET Nova's and TVR's lollollollollollollollollollollol
A Nova beat a 700bhp van up the strip at PVS last year.
....oh, wait lol
A Nova beat a 700bhp van up the strip at PVS last year.
....oh, wait lol
lol lol i would say thats BS, but my god how funny was Porters run against that lol lol
puntogtbax
25-02-10, 08:13 PM
this wasnt in a pub but a friend of a friend had a totally rotten standard xr3i and it done over 150 mph and outrun a T5 on the motorway lololol
Ive outrun/lost a T5 in a 1200 nova luxe before now lol
belly257
25-02-10, 08:21 PM
"i was driving through the lanes in my punto and a police t5 was following me i came to the end of the lanes and the policeman pulled me over and asked me wher i learnt to drive like that i was struggling to keep up"
i know this lad and it was a 1.0 punto 5 door:tard:
VTEC is a japanese tuning company. Apparently.
novaload1992
25-02-10, 09:02 PM
"i was driving through the lanes in my punto and a police t5 was following me i came to the end of the lanes and the policeman pulled me over and asked me wher i learnt to drive like that i was struggling to keep up"
i know this lad and it was a 1.0 punto 5 door:tard:
lol i like that one :thumb:
puntogtbax
25-02-10, 09:09 PM
wot on the m62 spud in a strait line
puntogtbax
25-02-10, 09:11 PM
i lost a t5 in my tuned punto gt was nippy tho
worst thing is they found my car a week later
wot on the m62 spud in a strait line
Yup, last petrol station before the brough turnoff, pulled into the forecourt and behind the building with lights off, got out to look as he shot by at silly mph lol
Not done anything wrong he just thought me and my mate were racing, which we actually werent:eek:
sulphur
25-02-10, 09:17 PM
lol lol i would say thats BS, but my god how funny was Porters run against that lol lol
Video on youtube? Would like to see this. :)
Boy i was in school with :tosser: said his dads sierra cosworth was doin 150mph and there was so much power the front wheels lifted, P.s he was 16 at the time of saying this :wtf:
brainsnova
25-02-10, 09:19 PM
i lost a T5 down the back of my sofa lol
andy_mk3
25-02-10, 09:33 PM
I Was Told That A Astra Mk2 1.3 Will Do 125mph!!!!!!!! Hahahahahaha
Yeah thats true................................if it was pushed off a cliff lol
False actually, terminal velocity would limit it to about 90mph, depending on conditions...
novalicous
25-02-10, 10:23 PM
you cant defrost frozen food while frozen :confused:
you cant eat frozen food while frozen :confused:
lol
naplom_26's mate has a 190bhp Astra
MattBrown
26-02-10, 10:54 AM
A lad in my local was selling a Yamaha DTR 125 field bike which "lifted up in every gear,had powerbands in every gear and did about 120"
I laughed so hard i nearly vomited.
I have one, believe me, theyre not quick!
However, my cradly factory kx125 did lift in 4th on me, then I came off:(
broken noselol
MattBrown
26-02-10, 10:56 AM
"i was driving through the lanes in my punto and a police t5 was following me i came to the end of the lanes and the policeman pulled me over and asked me wher i learnt to drive like that i was struggling to keep up"
i know this lad and it was a 1.0 punto 5 door:tard:
Im sure that was riggy, or some variation of a punto and a stupid mad driving sessionlol
GRUNT 16V
26-02-10, 12:48 PM
naplom_26's mate has a 190bhp Astra
HA HA HA LOL lol lol
Saloony
26-02-10, 06:45 PM
Saloony is a vaux techy.
RX8's need steel rods to get to 400bhp
the Nova 1.2 sting came in two spec levels, 118 bhp and 125bhp (the only difference was the tyres....) ;) proper oldies will remember that giggle
lol lol lol
C20XE pistons, with them rods mate :thumb:
this qualifies...http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ASTRA-GSI-2-0L-16V-REDTOP_W0QQitemZ230443048563QQcmdZViewItemQQptZAut omobiles_UK?hash=item35a779de73
his civic must be the 300 bhp 220mph model if he's trading up for that.
Jon_nova1
27-02-10, 07:54 PM
I have 180BHP and managed to chase a BMW at 150MPH lol
but it was a jap turbo, and only weighed about 1100KG lol
I have 180BHP and managed to chase a BMW at 150MPH lol
but it was a jap turbo, and only weighed about 1100KG lol
are you sure it wasn't a nova full of lads??????
Not quite the pub but I worked in a car parts/accessories shop at the weekend during my sixth form days and this brought me into contact with hundreds, nay, thousands of fantasists in the realm of all things automotive.
Of particular note was one chap who pulled up in a stock Series 1 Escort RS Turbo (they were still around back then) and claimed it had a '250bhp chip'. Most stories people came out with were unprompted and generally involved doing 160mph/wheelies/loop-the-loops in a 1.3 Astra.
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