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Anonymous
16-05-01, 03:16 PM
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following
exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's
card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the
woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was
quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver
to handle the tense situation.

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card.
The driver owned the car.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun
in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a
body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Trunk is opened; no body.
Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you
told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the
glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too"


Mmmmm forbidden donut. :)

Anonymous
16-05-01, 04:14 PM
:)

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Anonymous
16-05-01, 04:15 PM
duh! it was posted on general chat a couple of days ago under "im p###ed off so....."

think it was damian coull???who posted it.

*************************
2 cups down 1 to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*************************

Anonymous
16-05-01, 07:05 PM
de ja vu?

Anonymous
17-05-01, 08:04 AM
bugger!! never saw it on there, a mate of mine just emailed it to me!!!!! oh well sh1t happens!!!!!

Mmmmm forbidden donut. :)

Anonymous
17-05-01, 11:43 AM
Worth repeating tho' :)

Anonymous
17-05-01, 02:12 PM
Two cannibals captured a missionary. They cooked him up and started to

Eat him....one at his head....one at his feet.

The one shouted down to the other one..."How are you doing?"

He replied,"I'm having a ball!"

"You're eating too fast!"